Let it Snow!

I have been in the Boise Valley for almost 16 years (wow!) and have never seen this much snow, ever. The other night driving home I couldn't stop grinning. I love snow, although I bet if I was in Sandpoint I'd be bitching like the rest of them. They have an amazing amount of white stuff and it just keeps stacking up.
Yesterday was a great day - Te and I got to drive the big truck around to do errands then we came home to work on our snow/fort slide combo. It was so refreshing to remember the happy emotions of my childhood when I would spends hours outside building, rolling, and playing in the snow. It is wonderful when one can connect with nature and connect with their own childlike qualities that make you realize that life is good - all the stress and headache of everyday life really is nill - it is so material. And we all know materials can be stripped off! So, when it snows, the sun shines, the birds chirp, etc. remember to let your child self resonate so you can really tap into the moment. It is all about the moment, of being present, not about what happened or what is going to happen. Find peace where you are now.

Te's photo debut

Boo got a new Vtech kidizoom digital camera. I didn't edit any pics and the ones with him in them are photo ops he requested. Obviously some images of myself I do not find too visually appealing but so be it. He can only get better with time - so the beginning of hopefully a productive photography hobby at the least. Also note that the right side of the image gets slightly cut off cause I do not want to redo my layout for the blog. Some pics are from the Zoo and the animals might be hard to be deciper so, so you know what you see: snow leopard, prairie dog, python snake, red panda - perhaps not all in that order. Cheers.

Free MySpace slideshows, photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

WOW! We have snow!

Experiencing the journey of finding your own spirit reflected in the world around you is why you are here.

Flooded with Love

There are those days when your child tests your wit and you want to scream and kick -then as they peacefully sleep or do something silly you have the "awww" moment and you can't stop grinning. As I am sure many parents know it's hard allowing them to become the person they're meant to be without putting some kind of conditions upon them. Trying to control them so you can feel in control. It's hard banging heads with a spouse or partner when you both have been raised in completely opposite households and have completely opposite parenting styles. However, as you go along you learn, you compromise, and you figure it out.

Right now Boo has been pretty trying. Not trying all the time - he just has his moments. Te has always been independent and has always liked to do it Te's way - he's very persistent. I bought a book a few months back called "Raising the Spirited Child" and in it it describes like five temperment types. Our boy is definitely persistent with an edge of intense. I would say both his parents are persistent and Jeff is definitely intense so no wonder the kid likes to do it his way. Now we are learning how to allow him to be an active part in most decisions concerning him in which he can be an active part and channeling his energy. Boo likes it his way, and mostly only his way - so you definitely have to pick your battles. I know at times Jeff thinks I am too lenient but I am not controlling like Jeff and I definitely have a higher tolerance level. I always try to put myself in Te's shoes and be reasonable. Jeff on the other hand has a tendency to be forceful, but in the last week he's changed a lot...I think he's having some "ah-ha" moments and realizing the conditions or boundaries he puts on Te - when he could more flexible and everyone has a win-win situation. It's all a learning experience and like they say, kids do not come with instructions. It's wonderful to learn and grow and Te just opens our eyes wider and wider. Perhaps the biggest reward kids teach is tolerance, if only everyone could remember what they were like and respect the child inside of themselves we might all be in a little happier place :)

Realization

I have always been one to learn about herbs and health, but never one to commit 100% because I have a tendency to procrastinate when it comes to committing to myself. In regards to Te, that is a whole other story, I do my best to keep my son healthy as possible. In past month I have now acquired my second cold. The first one lasted over two weeks and now I am about 4 or 5 days into another one that will probably go the distance of 10 days. I discovered on Monday that my right eye is bloodshot in the corner and I've got something going on on my scelera - I think I might have a cold in my eye too - if it doesn't clear I'll see the allopathic doctor.
Anyways - I started my health & nutrition class ten days ago (I had to restart from August) and it goes through May. Right now were becoming quite aware of our food choices. For a while now I've been working up to going on a cleanse or at least a 7 day juice fast - it's just that juicing is time consuming and I am short on time in the mornings. That said however, once I start juicing I know I'll have more energy. So the two colds and the weird thing in my eye have finally brought me to a cross in the road where I tell myself it's time to focus on you and your health. I do not want to come upon a severe crisis and try to work my way to health, I need to do it now and prevent a crisis situation.
So today I am experimenting with eating more raw. My goal for now is to try and eat 80% raw. I do not know if I can quite give up my coffee yet... So this day forward I will try and do my best to document my experience of active change within myself.
For lunch I made myself a salad that included 1 medium tomato, half an avocado, a clove of garlic, a squeeze of lemon, a light drizzle of olive oil and some fresh ground pepper.
This going raw will be a challenge - but right now I'm kind of motivated after being stuffy in the head for almost a month. So here goes to being healthy and whole!

Procrastination

I know when running a business it's imperative to be fairly efficient in handling customer returns and so forth when it comes to photographs. However, I guess my side photography business takes a backseat to everything I do - it's the last on my lists of "to do's." I need to change that - or I need to tell people it takes a couple months to see a return - and, if you haven't heard from me, pester me. Some people might say, "Well, it's not my job to pester you." Yes it is if I told you so - plain and simple. And the thing is, if you don't get pissy with me because my lack of being more aggressive in turning around your prints, often times if it has taken me awhile you'll end up with some great perk/s. Since I came back from Africa, like everything else, what happened before I left kind of got lost when I returned and it's taken me five/six months to catch back up to my life. It's not so much I was lost - it is more of me establishing healthy boundaries for myself and my family. I have a tendency to do a bajillion things at once - and I am learning how to do a bajillion things within reason without losing my head in the clouds and losing sight of my family. This little heads-up was obviously instigated by a disgruntled customer. So be it.

Evolution

Time moving forward - project progressing. Sometimes it seems it takes forever, yet there is never enough time to get 'er done. I admit I procrastinate, something I need to change - but I really do work best under stress - even if I am bitching all the way. I am not bitching about my project I've been working on for Small Village cause I've enjoyed it; it's just taken me forever to manifest it cause I've had trouble trying to wrap up the experience. Thus far I am pretty pleased with my production I just need to get the music I want swapped out and to add the captions and I am done. Kind of exciting and I believe those who see it will enjoy it. Now I finally have something to distribute. It has also motivated me to keep trucking along and put our entire trip into a presentation for all of us who traveled together. The DVD I've been working on just showcases our projects so it works two-fold and can also be used down the road for gaining sponsorships, marketing and so forth. It just brings the whole experience alive every time you reminisce through the images. It is pretty pathetic when I haven't even shown my family images of where I've been. So seeing the light at the end of the tunnel - knowing we can sit down at Thanksgiving or Christmas and share in my experience it's rather gratifying. Maybe it will give each of them a candle of light - a new perspective - an explanation for my passion.

Wednesdays with Te

So I have started working from home on Wednesdays - although the work normally doesn't start until after dark. I spend the majority of my day hanging and playing with Te. Yesterday was Duana's birthday and since last weekend the boys (Te, Kobe & Devin) have been wanting to see each other. They are so classic. When I call Duana of course I have to speak to both Kobe & Devin since Kobe normally picks up. From there the conversation goes on to "I want to talk to Te." So yes, it's pretty sweet to hear the one-sided conversation between friends. So yesterday good friends gotta share most of their day together.
Te and I started our day taking Stan on a hike near Dry Creek Cemetery. Both Te & Stan had their first snake encounter. A little bull snake on the trail on our way down the hill. Te was definitely more curious then Stan. When Stan went to sniff the snake of course the snake reared up and started flashing his tongue. He ran and hid behind me and Te while cautiously peering out between our knees. Te on the other-hand was completely enthralled in the snake and we stood on the trail and watched the snake until he slithered off up the hill.
After the hike we dropped Stan off and proceeded to Duana's. From there the boys just played and played. No naps mind you. They even did well at the gym where Duana teaches a BodyPump class - and all she asked of her close friend, husband, and mom was to double her numbers on her birthday. So we did. After working out we were crazy enough to take 3 young boys to the restaurant to eat (Chuckarama). By this time I think they had to be close to delirious having had no naps. I must say they actually did quite well. We sat in a corner booth and locked them in from both sides. Sporadically under the table, in the window... Anyways the night ended with the boys wrestling. As we were walking out of the restaurant Devin fell down and Te immediately jumped on top of him. That was quickly corrected as we walked out. Then as we all parted our ways the boys ran a few laps on the grass and dog-piled on another. It is such a great feeling to see how much they love each other from an early age.

Creative Consciousness

Whoa. This weekend I was planning on driving to Hailey (ID) with Te and go visit my cousin Bean - the weather was kind of poopy on Friday - thinking inward - nothing set in stone. The day cleared by noon and I decided to do some things around town. I got slightly distracted when I had the opportunity to go to Quality Art on a Saturday. Normally my Saturdays are filled by Market and I never have a chance to leisurely roam the aisles. I admit I was rather excited. I was going to splurge on a few things for myself as well as pick up some more paint for my Africa project. As it turns out I ended up buying more art supplies that are really meant for Te. Since we were in the neighborhood I decided to stop by Reham's to say howdy. Instead Te & I stayed for about 3 hours. Reham has a big show in Vegas in just under ten days and I decided to help her build inventory. I would of probably stayed into the early hours of darkness had it been unnecessary for Te to nap. My 2nd mosaic ever was a round mirror with a fish and some seaweed. Once I got my creative juices flowing they continue to flow. I came home, put the boy to bed, went downstairs and put a good thick coat of "Sand Between Your Toes" on the downstairs hallway. It's a nice warm color I picked out to make the basement a little more homey. Then a few window appliques - a fish, BSU -for Te to stick to the windows. And finally Saturday night concluded with Te and I watching "A Christmas Story" and me completing a crocheted hat for Te this winter. My night ended with me laying stir crazy in bed thinking of all these ideas to mosaic.
I made three more mosaics while Jeff attended to Te today. I am flipping addicted right now cause it feels so, so, so good to be creative. It's terrible when you forget what it feels like to be beyond passionate or should I say just tuned in. I can't stop - I am remembering what it feels like to live, breath, and dream about making art. This goes beyond just taking photographs. Painting, mosaicing, glass fusing those make me feel centered - active meditation. My mind is spinning, spinning, spinning.
Lest not forget the simple beauty of also watching Te grow up. I haven't written much about his progress like I did the first year with my "Notes to Te, " I need to be more consistent. A sweet story today. I was perusing the ads in the Sunday News and Te as usual has to come and get into my business. I see a Shopko ad and it has a toy catalog handout and I tell Te "Hey check this out," so I have a moment to finish reading what I am looking at. He thumbs through the ads all seriously pointing and commenting on things he sees and he asks me all serious, "how you get these toys momma?" I tell him you have to buy them. He proceeds to say, "I need to buy these toys momma." Lately everything with Te is, "Te will do it." Inquisitive questions of "Why do baby's fart?" Just normal humbling anecdotes of a developing child. Gotta love it. Tonight he is sleeping in his new bed set-up which includes a headboard that is housing all his books. So it is past midnite at this moment and he's still in his room trying to read by the hallway light. The books I knew might pose a temptation so in due time hopefully rhe newness of his new bed assembly, etc. will wear off so his little head is down for rest before the new day dawns.
Wow. I am kind of all over the place. I said my head was spinning!

October 10, 2007

I was perusing a CD of images from last Spring when we were working on my dad's house and found sweet, sweet pictures of Te-bug. Boy they grow fast. He was only just over a year so of course he was still a little rolly-polly guy. Anymore - he's lanking out and turning into a little boy. Most days he talks about now he grows big and strong. He is so much fun to watch - grateful for our blessing.

Today is one of those days where I feel flooded with emotion - where I just want to scream and kick and cry - I miss my dad, I miss him - I miss him - I miss him. I don't know what triggers these types of days other then when I feel like I am stomping through this world and it feels like there is no one of this plane who understands me. I was just listening to a song while the credits ran on the movie, The Wild, and I started to cry. Te asked me, "What's wrong momma, you sad? Are you crying momma? why?" Through my tears I said, "I miss my daddy." Te then says, "You miss your daddy momma, he in Heaven. It be OK momma." As he takes a hand pats me on the shoulder and then embraces me with a hug. Then he tells me some more that it will be OK and then he offered up his Mater Truck for me to play with - just what my heart needs.

Veggie Tunnel

Posting an image of the progress of our vegetable tunnel that we built, planted, etc. with about 8 villager women and the farmer, Mr. Mlaba who owns the land. Mr. Mlabais the gentleman on the right actually dug dirt from his own garden to use in these bags for planting the spinach plants in the veggie tunnel. It looks like Theo on the left who was the gentleman who actually found the land for us to build our project. It was one of our most successful. When I get my photos organized and posted I will upload the process it took to build this sustainable tunnel.

Sidenote: Mr. Mlaba has the MOST incredible singing voice. The first day we completed work we gathered in prayer - but I was kind of clueless at the instance it was taking place - and he started singing praise and it just warmed you up and gave you goosebumps. It was such a beautiful offering of spirit.

Vicariously

Today I talked with my friend Allison, who traveled to South Africa with me, and found out she will be doing her Ameri Corp stint at Camphill Village in Capoke, NY. I am kinda, sorta jealous of her because is sounds like a very enriching and exciting experience. She's doing things I wish I had when I was her age - but instead was too scared of something or apprehensive to truly set myself free. Don't get me wrong, I would of flown, but someone would of had to push me a little and those who needed to push me to express myself probably didn't really know my innermost hearts desires. Really my problem was that for ten years after my grandma died it took me forever to heal. When I finally found peace I was settled into a relationship that kept me pretty well content. Now that I would really like to abandon ship and travel the world and our country practicing goodwill - I am limited in scope because now I have a family. One of my obstacles is not so much having a child, but having a husband who gets it but doesn't get it. It's one of those things that's a little hard to explain. He supports me in what I do and I would love to physically share these experiences with him, but he's not a traveler, he's a lot of what I am not and at times it's like banging my head against a brick wall. He just doesn't get it. Some people might call me selfish, others might call me selfless. I know that when I travel and leave Te with Jeff or my family I have faith that everyone will be more then OK, Jeff worries and thinks about things not being OK. How does someone overcome that worrisome pessimism? I am also of the mindset that Te can come along, but Jeff again puts up the armor and says no. I pray by the time Te is eight he'll have the opportunity to travel and share in my hearts desire and his dad will have more faith in the "OK". I know we have a lifetime ahead of us to share together, but I know already at a young age he has so much to give - and the sooner you can share something with them outside of themselves the door swings wider and the global community gets smaller. I learned at a young age from my grandma about giving back, I also learned the trait from my Aunt TT. Te will learn it first in his community - then spread his wings as his community grows as he grows. So even though I can't go to CampHill like Allison, I can go to Camphill and visit Allison and that's what I plan to do, Te in tow.

Something Wonderful

Today I received a delightful email from my South Africa friend Debbie who put my art project in motion. Originally the plan was for my project to take place when we had the Youth Exchange with the United Church Boarding School in Yeoville, Johannesburg. However, they forwarded our itinerary just a couple days before departure and it appeared we would have no time to implement the project because the kids would be matriching (testing) and in between testing they had ALL sorts of activities planned. So I left my canvas in Centocow when we departed for the city and told Debbie what the project was about. Ironically a couple days before I told her about my project she had been visiting with the nuns at the mission and the nuns had commented on how they desperately needed something for their walls. So with that said, the wheels were in motion. Debbie said she would get the four canvases dispersed among some children and have them paint their interpretation of the senses of peace. The senses of peace being smell, taste, feel, see, etc. So this is a canvas in the works and according to the teacher this is the first time these students have ever used paints. I can hardly wait to receive my canvas that will most certainly be treasured in my house wherever I go.

Life rolling along

It's been ages since I've sat down to write. A lot has obviously happened in the last month. We were in and out of town the last six weeks so that would partially explain my writing absence. This summer has flown by with my trip to Africa and then these past six weeks of traveling to Sandpoint, Salt Lake, and Seattle. I am getting closer to formulating my thoughts about my Journey in June. I need to get my thank yous out to all the people who supported me in my project. I try to explain the experience but I really can't - the only way anyone will know what it's like is to travel there. So - in my attempt I am writing about what we did, including photos, and a couple stories written by our students. With a "thank you packet" perhaps I can illustrate the experience. Once I manage to get the thank you packet completed I will post a blog or a link from my developing web page.
Ironically a few weeks back I put the intention out there of "how can I go to Africa every year or every other year?" The Universe responded by introducing me to a few more people involved with organizations that travel to Africa and now I have to figure out how I can convince Jeff to allow me to continue this desirable pursuit.
So beyond Africa our summer has included spending Saturdays at the Market. We went to Sandpoint the 2nd weekend in August and had a little mini reunion among old friends. Merris had me rolling with laughter - I have not cried or laughed so hysterically where I couldn't breath in eons. The last weekend in August we spent in Salt Lake for Diane & Ray's wedding and a Nodzu family reunion. It was nice to actually see the WHOLE clan minus Uncle Tom (Guzman). Then this past weekend we were in Seattle for the BSU vs. UW game (which stunk) and we were able to share our time throughout the weekend with my mom & Beboot, niece, nephews, sisters, and brother-in-law. Te is now learning the families - names that is - before we went to Salt Lake I was rattling off all the names of the Nodzus and he told me to quit talking. There was like 50 of us. He's gotta learn the names, cause at Thanksgiving there is usually about 30 of us. The little people's names are easy to retain since that's the company he keeps - but when I showed him a picture of Tom and his siblings he referred to all of them as grandmas and papas. Go figure. More tomorrow.

Deadline

I can thank my friend Reham for talking me up and giving me a deadline. I could probably talk and talk forever about what I want to do with my pics from Africa and now she has me processing my presentation. I want to actually do a pretty large scale installation - and now Dana, the reporter who wrote the great story about me & Jeff, knows I have this "Africa idea" and plans on reporting about whatever I manifest in November. It has definitely been a work in progress in my mind - now I have to physically put it together - which means I have to start to identify with what South Africa and it's people meant to me, how it changed me, what we as individuals can do to help others, etc. It's a pretty monumental undertaking - I guess that means I have to start taking a day off from work just to get this thing built ...that's OK! I will inform all of you when it all starts to come together and those that are resourceful friends that can help - you'll be getting phone calls or emails here shortly!

It's been awhile

Well - I haven't been blogging consistently the past couple weeks because I haven't been on my computer at night as much as I normally am. In fact, I've kind of shunned the computer on the weekends as well so I don't get much photo editing or blog thinking writing done. Oh well. There has definitely been some exciting stuff going on in our lives. Most recently the Idaho Statesman ran a nice article on Jeff and I in the Sunday Life section. http://www.idahostatesman.com/387/story/125115.html It's nice to be recognized. This last week at Market I sold a couple mobiles and a chick painting so I need to get busy and work, work, work. Especially with the article coming out I should have a full booth to complement. I am also going to pursue a venue in Eagle for selling some of my personal art so we'll see how it starts to pay off!
Wednesday begins our six weeks of coming and going. We're headed to Sandpoint this weekend for a mini-reunion with friends and family. Next week we're home. The 22nd we're off to Salt Lake for a Nodzu wedding, home the 1st & 2nd; then off to Seattle for the BSU vs. UW game where we'll be fortunate enough to stay with my mom and visit with my sisters, nephews, and niece. Jeff will be exhausted from traveling for awhile after the 8th - he's not one for traveling so much - me on the other hand am extremely excited to see family and the country along the ride.

Super Fabulous Sunday

Yesterday the Temeister and me ventured up to the Beach on the Main Payette just south of Banks with my good friend Julie and leisured in the sun and river for about 2.5 hours. It was awesome to just getaway for a couple hours and out of town - it is amazing what it can do for my attitude. We hung out on the sandbar which is perfect for Te since it's so shallow, and perfect for me since on one side it's almost like walking into the deep end. He was so self-contained and easy it was perfect. We managed to get home with three hours to spare to prepare for the BBQ we hosted last night for Tom's birthday, my birthday, & LaDawn's birthday. I worked non-stop from the moment I walked through the door until Duana & clan showed up at 6pm. Te slept until 545pm so that was an added bonus. Te had a fun-filled day with the river, friends, and family. Devin & Kobe are his best buds - it is fun to watch their dynamics evolve - they'll be very much like brothers as they get bigger and older. I am grateful for my relationship with Dui - for myself and for Te. Celso even managed to make an appearance which made all the better. I'll get some pictures posted of yesterday. Sundays are now my designated days to go to the Payette with Te - minus next weekend when Julie, Te, & I will be attending the Goddess Fest for some palm reading or something of the sorts :) In the Fall Sundays will turn into hiking days. I also did not turn my computer on the entire weekend which was a feat in and of itself - but actually very very liberating, so I think it will also be a new practice.

Trade

Anymore when I take photos of Te he insists that it is his turn to take pictures. He knows the difference between my camera and his dad's camera and I am now starting to teach him about the different parts of an SLR camera - thus far we've learned "viewfinder." My camera is a bit heavy for a little tyke to hold so we always make sure the strap is around the neck and have faith it will be safe in little hands. I know the weight can be a little cumbersome because today when I was commuting to work on my bike I was questioning myself on why my bag felt heavier today, I remembered I had my camera and it is always loaded with a 28-200 lens. Anyways in order for me to get the two photos I got of Te yesterday morning he had to take about five pics of momma - the best one of Te's is posted here and you can tell the before and after shot once I made a compromise with Te that if he let me take his picture eating his peanut butter and nutella toasted sandwich for breakfast he could take a photo of me.